Baby is all grown up.  She is almost ready for the Christmas ball and now that we have our first scheduled DGW, we can see her off to some real down home scheduling dilemmas.  The week that was saw the typical…  City scored late to win.  The bottom feeders kept feeding becoming starving lunatics, and the Teams under City are all starting to distance themselves from the also-rans.  Transferring is a fickle beast.  You can take it out for wine and chocolates but there is no guarantee that it calls you in two days to show you any kind of reward.  We know that we did nothing wrong with our courting process, did our research only to be left staring at our phones with no benefits to show.  We call this the “friendzone” of transfers.  The most popular transfer every week since Week 3 has basically blanked every week except for when the Mo Salah explosion happened.  Or as he is being touted on the auto-correct world of Twitter Mo Salad.  Not every week is supposed to be rosy, these are still athletic competitions that are played by men.  Sorta.  So transferring wisely is great advice, but wait til the last possible moment and use all the tools in the shed to get a finite answer on your transfer-dom.  In case you want some gingerly advice, here are some Week 16 transfer ideas for all y’all.  Cheers!

Eden Hazard, Chelsea – The last bus left the station a week ago.  Sorry, but I told you twice to get him in.  Gloat with your Eriksen assist or whomever else you still may own with the pricey price tag.  They aren’t Hazard at the moment.

David de Gea, Man United – Name three other players that you would own over de Gea?  You can’t.  Now go look at the point differential between him and the second place point tally among keepers.  It is 20 points!  Ok, ok, ok it’s actually 19, but rounding up sounds sexier.  His point return per million is better than every single player in the official game.  Screw the other keepers and after this week go get de Gea at 5.9!

Harry Maguire, Leicester – Zero rotation risk and price that is a cuddly mid 5’s.  Leicester has Newcastle, Southampton and Palace the next three.  Sounds nice enough to me.

Christian Kabasele, Watford – Watford is the hot buy this week.  They are basically Fingerlings or electric socks type hot. Upcoming fixtures, differential and form are all there for the CK one.

Gylfi Sigurdsson, Everton – Big Sam is going to get the best out of his best players period.  29 points in last 4 is no fluke, we know what the Icelandic wunderkind can do and he is a fantasy asset.,  Just gotta swallow that he plays for Everton and that he is 8 bucks.

Charlie Austin, Southampton – Please play every week and let us remember the QPR good ole days.

Dominic Calvert-Lewin, Everton – The new fad is to punt way down for a rotational third striker with flair. 4.9 and plenty of Big Sam Flair. Oumar better watch out or he will be non-existent…again.