What just happened?  Did I get on some weird mystery machine that went back in time to when useless goals were all the rage?  What’s next, Sam Allardyce will be back managing a scuppering club too I bet…. oh wait.  So Week 14 came and went and the prominent highlights were people we don’t own and rotations that only lasted 70 minutes. Chelsea, Liverpool, and to some degree, Man City pulled the ookey-dokey on us this week in the rushed schedule which saw Mo Salah, Eden hazard, and basically prove that Pep is a liar with not wanting to play Aguero/Jesus together all happen. I usually err on the side of caution when it comes to transfers and bringing people in with rotation risks, but the first two names I mentioned are the easy solution.  The City thing is fairly visible that it will be sane to come in for one of Aguero or Jesus.   Other than that, I am on tilt with the returns of some teams, Arsenal scored 5 versus a down-trodden Terrier squad and the rest of the EPL basically is what we think they are.  I am skimming not wanting to get into a long diatribe about every team in the Premier as it relates to fantasy all in the warm up, you gotta stick around til after the bump for some transfer ideas.  If I put out on the first date what kind of expert would I be.  A bad slutty one!  So now that the wooing process is over stick around for some transfer goodies for the FPL Week 15.  Cheers!

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As much as some fantasy premier league managers complain about how the game has changed season to season, one truth has remained steadfast: the right captain pick will one hundred percent make or break your gameweek score. My own personal record of picking correctly has been pretty piss-poor in 2017, but I keep reminding myself that you have to play the best choice with the information at hand and not beat yourself up too much for getting it wrong. I’m hoping to improve and see green arrows again, and if not, then I will ask for support from this week’s theme and everyone’s favorite household object, whiskey! Best of luck!

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Injury and mystique.  Rotation and differentials.  That’s what the FPL does.  The attacking-type players that I am speaking of are becoming fewer and farther between as we get more nodded on with a template-type format for the front 8 players.  Yes, I said 8.  Because you have to roster 8.  Those two punts that you casually stroll out as Midfielders are dying as you walk in the door, so go to coat check with your Carroll’s and RLC’s.  The week 13-15 schedule is going to take a firm bite out of everyone’s lineups and no one is a tad bit nervous at all.  The fact of the matter is that the 3 games in eight days thing is a real conundrum.  Now add in the most rostered type players, who some have rotation issues.  Some are already injured… Sadio.  Then add in the battle ground of playing 3 fixtures in that 8 day period.  If you are picking up what I am spitting then you need to start figuring out those bench spots and think for the future instead of looking at how good one fixture looks for week 12.  So for the short-sighted… here are the week 12 FPL rankings for Middies and Forwards.  Cheers!

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In now over a decade of competing a ton of different fantasy sports, the dubious task of ranking a bunch of dudes chasing after a ball/puck for the sheer shake of scoring points has never rested on my shoulders. This week, I’m gonna try my best to step up and tell you which players are gonna shit on the competition and give you the big returns that fuel your green arrows of eternal joy. This is not about value, but who will get you points this gameweek. I seriously have no idea how this is done, but I’ll be using a mixture of form, fixtures and gut feel – for the record, I have a case of the bubbleguts right now as I write this, so that’s probably the X factor in all of this. TMI? Nah, just tryna be transparent, yo!

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For those of you affected by the late scratches of Kane and Coutinho (or any other player I’m unaware of getting scratched), I feel for you. The good news was that we didn’t have a moronic Friday fixture to make things go completely nuts, and there was time to take a hit or two if needed. While I wish the hits I took were that sweet cess, these hits are at times necessary and are less painful when everyone’s taking a hit at the same time. It’s like a second-hand cloud of negative points toward everyone’s season total.

This week was low-scoring overall, with the average being just 46 points. Keep that in mind as you see some red arrows, that they might have been just a point or two away from being a green arrow. Hopefully these red arrows come with the caveat of having made your team deeper (to prevent last-minute benchings/injuries from giving  you a zero) or helped you shift around your funds in a more logical manner.

  • Note: please feel free to provide me with any suggestions on this article. Readers, however many you are, let me know if you want to see anything done with it.

Cheers!

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Rankings make the world go round.  They dictate the flow and structure for almost every fantasy sport…except the direct ramifications of the official game.  Rankings are great but when the relate to the beautiful game of footie they don’t always translate completely because of the limits that exist in with the transfers system in place.  I get it, I type this stuff every week and it is to be used as a guide for just what I said, gauging transfers.  These ranks are all based on match-ups, form and a whole bunch of common sense.  Mixed with a little of nonsense that spews from my cranium.  FPL rankings are hard because line-ups lock an hour before the first game kicks off so the exact science of this is strictly guess work, and now that the 11 teams that played midweek in the Carabao Cup have played we can get a more ideal look at the possibilities that will exist in the realm of fantasy FPL for Week 10.  So enjoy the ranks, use them, trade them with your friends (if you have any) and best of luck.  Cheers!

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GW 9 Highest Scoring Forwards

Player Goals Assists Bonus Points, Cards, PK, CS  Total Score (Week/Season)
Kane, TOT 2 1 3 BP 16/63
Murray, BHA 2  3 BP, 1 CS 13/20
Batshuayi, CHE 2  –  3 BP 12/15
Depoitre, HUD 1 3 BP, 1 CS 9/25
Okazaki, LEI 1 1 3 BP 9/31
Aguero, MCI 1  – 1 BP, 1 CS 7/59
Rashford, MUN 1  2 BP, 1 YC 7/41
Diouf, STK 1 1 BP 7/38
Lacazette, ARS 1  – 6/40
Rooney, EVE 1 6/38
Afobe, BOU 1 5/12
Niasse, EVE 1  – 5/19
Lukaku, MUN 1 5/57
Ayew, SWA 1 5/28
  • Kane scoring goals at home now? Wooooooooooooooooo! He’s going to finish as the top goal scorer, again. Yes, that means you should have him on your side.
  • Bill Murray gets on the board in his first premier appearance of the season.

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As the world of fantasy scurries to get as many City players into their lineups, the rest of the world is trying to figure out a way to stay afloat if they do not have those key ingredients.  Now, on paper, it looks like an overwhelmingly top-heavy rankings this week, especially for the City folk.  But Burnley has been a limiting bunch in the fantasy world when it comes to facing off against higher potential offenses limiting both Liverpool and Spur to just one goal on the road.  Add in the two allowed to Chelsea in the opening week, and a total of 4 goals allowed in all away games this year it could appear that they are a more stout team on the road.  For fantasy sake, I think that City offensively is just clicking right now and is a damned if you do damned if you don’t proposition.  Regardless, I think that the investment needs to be there on the off chance that they do score in order to keep up with “Jones’.  The other top teams: Spurs and Chelsea have interesting games that could swing either way and completely turn this week’s scoring on its head.  So roster wisely ole friends, and may your point returns be bountiful.  Here’s the second part of Week 9 rankings for the FPL.  Cheers!

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Hey campers, I’ve decided to change the format this week because I’m not sure how informative any of my past takes have truly been. While the tables below are literally just the top scoring players by position per last round, I feel like giving it a try.  The MF list this week was pretty long, so I’ve left out players that didn’t score above 3 points (90 min + 1 CS for those of you scoring at home). It may not be waxing prose, but who scored the points is as relevant as it gets to our lovely pocket of the football universe, since the currency we deal in is indeed FPL points and not effort points or gold stars.

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If yesterday was Thanksgiving, then today is Black Friday with all the goodies in store for you. From a fantasy perspective obviously.  The Defenders and Keeper rankings are nice and are the biggest differential to be had in the game.  The midfielders and forwards are def the staple items.  You need to have a City player, you need to have an investment in a certain grouping of strikers. These are just great rules of thumb as it relates to FPL.  I don’t claim to be the shelter from a rain storm, but I do sell some of the best umbrellas.  Ya dig?  With the returns of some key players and the departure of some others from the international break period it is making the front 8 selection process a muddled up beast.  The biggest crunch that I am noticing right now is the move away from the power three forwards to more of a power two and then finding the funds to have coverage from the key players and the under-owned ones…cough…Alexis. So one week at a time my friends and one or maybe two transfers at a time as well.  Good luck this week and here are the rankings for the middies and strikers.  Cheers!

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