Ah the new year, and a new Costa?  It couldn’t be true if you had a paint-by-the-numbers-book guiding you the entire way.  It may actually be true, I am just here to reel you in a little bit.  I am the “Wilfred Wolf” of the FPL.  I am a fixer who analyzes, makes snap judgments, blames someone else, than eventually I point you in the right direction like the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz.  It’s not the case here though, if you have the funds and the testicular fortitude, then by all means, Diego is your man.  This is on the heels of the sour taste Jamie Vardy has left, and now he is gone for like… forever.  That was my teenage persona filling in for half a tick.  Vardy is out from the latest report, for at least 1 game, but guess what there is? A FA cup game in between for us to all look at the goods around the Premier to augment your roster.  So with Vardy comes a roster spot. In steps Diego.  That same Diego who has 3 goals in his last 2.  The only problem is the upcoming fixture list (vs. West Brom, vs. Everton and @Arsenal), but Diego gets hot in spurts and now might be that time.  It wasn’t sooooo long ago that he did Everton Dirty and West Brom is well West Brom.  So for those of you getting that WC itch, settle down a little.  Free piece of advice, wait until the Cup games are over before doing anything drastic.  For those of you that are in need of a good forward for a spell, then Diego is by all intents and purposes that dude.  Which Dude though? You can pick from his kindergarten photo, current or in 5 years…

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It’s like the way of the world: hurry up and wait… until this week, and the week to follow.  So this week’s posts will encompass a mass of fantasy knowledge and then will be shrunken down into a pocket-sized encyclopedia of usefulness.  So the Transfer Tuesday post usually is to steer you in the right direction for the upcoming week, but with the second game only 2-3 days after, there is no time to waste.  Rankings and such are easy and will be posted over the weekend, I may even give you an updated transfer post based on injury, fitness and basically my penchant for laziness.  So this week’s advice is fairly simple as one guy is linked to another.  It’s like fantasy hop-scotch, with an emphasis on the scotch.  I will give you one guy, then will immediately give you the guy you wanna use for the following week.  So you basically get two for the price, without actually paying for anything to begin with.  Also, it is starting to get to be an important part of the season for everyone on your bench to be a useful entity, no more salary dumps.  Sound good?  Well, it sounds just ducky to me.  Here are the adds for Week 18 followed by the immediate guy I would hop to for Week 19 on a transfer basis.

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At what point… check that, we are at the dawn of an amazing fantasy precipice in regards to the team from Watford.  The Odion Ighalo love has blossomed into the previous preseason darling of a twin in Troy Deeney.  The funny thing is when you ask anyone, there is no wrong answer in selecting either of the two.  If you have been rostering Iggy all year, then by all means, stay the course.  For those of you, and that number is a generous 74% of you who don’t, the time to maybe shift your gears off of whomever or whatever trio you were rostering for the strike position. The ownership differential isn’t going to get any better in your favor.  Deeney is owned in less then 4% of all leagues, that number falls lower for the fellas/ladies we are chasing in the top-1000 teams to under 3%.  The Hornets schedule isn’t the prettiest coming up, but to be honest, we said that previously as they trudged through the likes of United and West Ham.  Are they forever roster ideas, the one including Deeney?  Probably not, but a nice match with Sunderland and the up/down affairs of Liverpool loom ahead, and to me, that is a little bit of alright.  Here are some other transfer ideas in the FPL for Week 16.  Cheers!

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I know old new is just that…old, but to the point that it really hasn’t affected anyone yet from a roster standpoint means a hill of beans to me and others.  Payet went down and the roster adjusting has only really started and won’t truly finish until this round of Int’l break games is completely over and kaput.  So the best piece of advice I can give you from a creepy Uncle kind of way is; wait 48 more hours post reading this and then attack the needs on your roster thusly.  Not everyone will/should have a double free transfer at their disposal, I mean you should if you listened to me just a little bit, but that is neither here nor there.  So for the few that do you are probably looking at a direct replacement for Dimitri as he was owned in over 30% of leagues before going down, the second one will be a filler for a needy defender or another player suffering from a little niggle.  So here are some tactical ideas I have concocted in my den of zen, also known as my garage,  Cheers and good luck for the week with your transfers in and out.

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Sit with me if you will, and let’s separate time and space.  It was an eerily similar time last year when Harry Kane in all his cheap priced goodness sat on the bench waiting for the time to shine.  It is almost exactly one year to the date give or take a week or so.  We can do that, we are all friends and stuff, fake fantasy friends.  He was an under-utilized, under-valued (or so we found out) and soon to be roster darling.  He ended the year with 21 net bulges and tons of unregistered bulges from all the COYS rooters.  So here we are now, Kane was basically overpriced for his production to date, until this week happened and everyone is sitting with £3-4m in their kitty from the roster expunging of Kun. So the big question is do you and at what cost.  Vardinho needs to stay in your lineup, so avert your eyes elsewhere.  He falls into that secondary striker mode a la Pelle and Lukaku. Kane’s schedule is decent enough for the next 10 matches that you may want to roster now, enjoy the roster salary boost and then re-assess after week 19.  So that is my main advice this week, if you are looking for a “ride or die” option up top for the foreseeable future, then The Hurricane is your man.  For those of you not sold and may need help elsewhere, here’s some decent match-up and form based transfer assessments for ya.  Cheers!

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Two guys, not one but two shocked the world of FPL this week.  Radio Raheem went all “I am freshly baked and back from Jamaica” and the Dutch Easy Bake Oven known as Giorginio Wijanldum.  Their ownership prior to the past weekend’s fixtures combined were under 12%.  The funny thing about that little thing is 8% of those teams are dead in the water and waiting for the call back from The Real World.  Unexpectancy is fun and it makes the world a round place, Columbus said that.  The key this week is to wait out those 4 UCL games for the the likes of Arsenal. Chelsea, Man City and Man United.  Waiting is clutch especially when the injury fairy jumps up and snaps ya in the ass like a turtle all tripped out on Mescaline. So as the usual, make moves to help your club today and tomorrow. Don’t follow the flock, and if you have stars that struggled a bit, be patient.  I am clearly looking at everyone that brought in Pelle and De Bruyne last week.  Points are coming.  This week let’s see what the Ole Smoke Dog has in store for you in terms of transfer ins and outs. Cheers!

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Any good or wise pirate always waits to plunder the booty.  Honesty that could maybe, quite possible transfer over to other professions as well; porn stars, dental hygienists, shoe salesman….the list is honestly endless.  With the news from the break filled with bleakness in terms of ownership of players that fell down and got hurt. Sergio Aguero, David Silva, Tim Krul, Aleksandar Kolarov, Shane Long, Branislav Ivanovic are all the names that take form in the shape of the boo-boo squad.  No other injury though is as roster jarring as the Aguero one.  Prior to break and fresh of the 5 goal performance he was transferred in by over 100k teams.  By the time Friday rolls around that number of transferred out should be approaching 300k.  The good news for you is that you can officially buy anyone in the official game because he is the most expensive player.  There’s always a but! Patience while I take a sip of my apple juice.  You aren’t going to get that same Kun affect from a player transferred  in, plus you are going to have a ton of money in the Kitty.  The tempestuous beast will stare at you for days and may force you and all your kin for that -4.  It’s something that you and all your boys will debate ad nauseum. In this case I or my fellow Razz kin will not make fun of you for turning a positive into a negative.  So stick with me on the Transfer Tuesday journey down the rabbit hole of fantasy life.

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Well shucks.  Even double shucks.  When a cheap, usable player goes down and completely harpoons your roster, it sends ripples through the fantasy transferdom.  Where that ripple starts is no idea but what I do know is that we all end up wearing really cool futuristic clothing a la the Matrix.  So Callum Wilson is/was now Neo, and we all are Morpheus.  If that isn’t a daily booster, I don’t know what is.  Walk around today telling yourself and the barista who makes that frappa-mocha drink who you are.  FPL giggles it would be cool to hear them call out your name when that drink is done.  So get ready to Morph your roster this week, because guys are blowing up, hobbling off and that WC (If you still own it) burning a hole in your pocket.  So continue to read and take the red pilll or go somewhere else get bored to death, and take their blue pill.  It’s transfer tuesday as well as a UCL week.  If that doesn’t do it for ya, then you prolly need a different blue pill.  Cheers!

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Who needs ideas?  We all don’t but I am going to speak anyone.  Usually out of turn and inappropriately.  I am like a turrets patient but only in a matter of speaking about footie.  So this week is all about defense and forward additions.  The midfield options seem like a lateral move for anyone and how many times can you bring in the same 5-6 guys that basically everyone else uses.  Thinking outside the box is always good, unless there is a dirty mind behind your thought process and the thinking inside the box is a fantastic thing.  See turrets, I told you.  So enjoy the mid-week Capital One Cup fixtures and fingers crossed for injuries, so don’t be so fast making transfers this week.  Sit and wait until all the games are complete and then attack. Cheers!

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Everyone has an enjoyable stream against team.  Newcastle is currently it for me and as I try and persuade you also let’s divulge into the crappiness that is the Toons.  Since February 28th of last year, that’s 17 matches they have managed 9 points out of 51, 2 wins and 3 ties,  that’s it.   To date this year they have 2 goals.  Watford is in the top 5 in goals allowed, which sounds like an opposite day stat but is actually good.  Newcastle is the fantasy black pit right now, you tell all your friends to go there, but you avoid it like the dickens.  So with week 6 streaming towards us and a Champions League schedule to boot, injuries for that and the upcoming week will be clutch.  So go get some adderall, a nice big caffeinated drink of your choosing and read what I have to say for the next 3 minutes.  I promise it may be education or funny.  Or both.

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