So we attack the long first break of the year with some Week 4 goodies. As we all know, the basis of any good team is a good defense.  Without it, the goal would just be pummeled with shots and no goalie to stop them, making the score infinite.  That for the sake of all that is holy doesn’t actually happen, so much like reality, fantasy has to have keepers and defense.  they round out every nutritious fantasy breakfast, and if played right can be more prosperous than some striker combinations.  For the sake of this week’s match-ups though, the teams with some normal fantasy usefulness are turned into just fodder.  I am staring glaringly obviously at the City/Liverpool match which kicks of this week’s action bright an early on Saturday morning.  So to start the week yesterday was Transfer ideas and targets and now come the cavalcade of rankings for your viewing pleasure.  Cheers!

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International duty, or doodie if you have a three-year-old’s sense of humor like me, is going to make some of the rankings this week a bit fun.  Yeah, I will use fun because it’s really not going to be because speculating on stuff only makes me look bad and invites you to point the finger of your choosing at me. The news on Antonio Valencia and other South American based players returning on time for Saturday? Sunday duty is sketchy to say the least.  So if you own or have any inklings of going that route with your roster, I would strongly encourage you to look elsewheres.  So with that, we get into the clean sheet crapshoot purveyors, the defenders of both the box and goal line and like any game played it is tied to both luck and skill… unfortunately.  It is still a little early to completely rely on form of fixture, and I would still use my gut on the form thing.  If it look’s like a duck and doesn’t score like a duck, then it probably is a duck.  So keep that in mind as there are some interesting clean sheet options this week with Arsenal, Chelsea, and West Ham looking like stronger clean options, but others still exist like Burnley.  So good luck this week, Cheers!

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We’re once again giving you our loves and hates for each week in a segment called “Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em”.  You should know the drill, but if you don’t, we pick one option from each position, and then, for a bonus, we show you our genius lineups for the week.  Pretty cut and dry, and quite simply… basic.  We used to do this in tandem, but since I am flying solo while Ralph explores all the tallest mountains in the world, you are stuck with my and only my opine.  It’s like musical chairs, without all the screaming kids and regretful feeling of loss. So sit back, relax, and have a look at who we would start and sit based on match-ups and value. It’s Fantasy Premier League Start ‘Em, Sit ‘Em, Week 34 (plus a sleeper/under-owned fella that should be owned and isn’t).

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This week’s rankings are condensed like soup.  Add the double week, and you have yourself a meal.  There are a ton of one game options that could make sense to try and squeeze out some value.  And by ton, I mean maybe a handful.  Doubling up this week is all the fad, its like the regular Oreo good, but with double the filling.  So twice the sugar, adrenaline, and hype of regular game weeks.  Whether you choose to maximize your roster via the WC or one of the chips at your disposal, you need to have a minimum of 8 DGW guys playing this week in order to keep up with the Jones’s.  United, Arsenal, and Liverpool look like the best three options to max out your roster to three from each squad.  Whether or not all players play both fixtures, well… I am not the Amazin’ Kreskin and not the best guesser on the planet, second best maybe. So transfer wisely, use good judgement and if you need to take a minus to get points back in your chase now is not the time to be all scared of the repercussions.  You will make it up just on minimal returns of a guy playing two games.  So the minus is not a deterrent for success this week and Doubles rule all!  Cheers!

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Keeps and defense don’t need an intro.  It’s the entry-way into every week.  It isn’t everyone’s favorite, but not everyone likes every flavor of ice cream, but in the end… it is still freaking ice cream.  The stuff you get whether you win or lose when you were in little league.  So while you are up getting ice cream, to read this post think about the possibilities of clean sheets.  The clean is what drives the futility and success of the back-enders production.  Some say it’s suave and hair cut preferences.  I say that is non-sense.  It has everything to do with keeping the ball out of the net.  That is a free 4 points for each and every guy, times however many defenders you start.  To me that is a good start to any fantasy team.  I like free stuff and capitalizing on positive fixtures in your defense and keeper’s favor is the way to go.  So with that, have the weekly rankings for the Fantasy Premier League for Week 24.  Just click that little red button 7/8″ of an inch below.  Distance may vary depending on screen size, fishing ability, and your propensity to lie.

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No need to break ’em up this week, as we are in a hurry.  So you get all the rankings, all in one handy dandy Swiss Army knife type useful thing-a-majiggy.  I know that’s not a word, but spell your ambitions for a bit and just enjoy the rankings as they are.  If you wanted word-smithing, you would go to a more proper site that likes to stick it’s pinky out.  Though in fairness, those are the same guys, who two weeks after I call out a guy, they make a proclamation of their own and endlessly promote themselves as genius.  Well congrats, to them and their vanity.  Pfffft.  So enough with the side-winding talk and the endless barrage of non-information.  Here is the Week 22 Rankings for the FPL.

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When you walk into a club, any club we don’t care what side of the line you are on here at Razzbol FC, the first thing you do is check the surroundings.  You don’t just walk in and take the first place available. Nope you must take it all in.  That is my motto that I am embossing on all my t-shirts for the keeper and defence of things for fantasy footie.  Because once you’re in there you need to find out who is the guy going to keep you out of trouble, and who are the girls who are going to be your safety net.  They all can’t be winners, hell even some Razzball writers on the oft chance occasionally get laid and procreate.  They are not unlike most people in the industry…trolls is a good word.  Me and Ralph handsome as all get out, that’s why we are the face of this store front. So this week is fairly similar to last, several evenly contested matches, and the likelihood of clean-sheetedness is as about as good as hanging with fantasy insiders and not actually talking about anything but fantasy inside stuff.  Lame is the best way to describe it, captains of our industry my eye. More like captains of the AV club.  Anyway rant over, rankings ahead, so hoist the sails, put on some Chaka Khan and lets get down tonight or day (Stupid time zones).

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As always for rankings sake we start in the back and work our way forward.  It’s sorta like looking in your closet for that one missing shoe.  Instead of shoes we have actual, uniformed wearing players who will score fictitious points for your fictitious fantasy teams.  So in reality that shoe that will never be found and the fantasy players, points and teams are all figments of the the reality we live in.  Weird.  Next thing I am going to find out is that there are no Luck dragons named Falcore and that story really ended, unbeknownst to me.  While I ponder infinity, enjoy the back end fantasy assets for week 7.  Cheers!

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Who needs ideas?  We all don’t but I am going to speak anyone.  Usually out of turn and inappropriately.  I am like a turrets patient but only in a matter of speaking about footie.  So this week is all about defense and forward additions.  The midfield options seem like a lateral move for anyone and how many times can you bring in the same 5-6 guys that basically everyone else uses.  Thinking outside the box is always good, unless there is a dirty mind behind your thought process and the thinking inside the box is a fantastic thing.  See turrets, I told you.  So enjoy the mid-week Capital One Cup fixtures and fingers crossed for injuries, so don’t be so fast making transfers this week.  Sit and wait until all the games are complete and then attack. Cheers!

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