So I saw It over the weekend, and while I didn’t even come close to crapping my pants in fear (thanks hangover!), I’m about 99% sure that Harry Kane’s fear of August shares a creepy amount of commonalities with that homicidal crazed clown creature; both of them enjoy floating through open space (Kane on the pitch; the clown in a mind-altering expanse of sewer pipe only Mario would be jealous of), speaking in weird accents (seriously, listen to Harry Kane give an interview sometime), have an affinity for the color white (duh), and lastly, they both enjoy making red balloons go POP! (metaphorically speaking, that would be the hopes/dreams of all Gunner fans everywhere; FFS that’s not a spoiler! he’s a clown, he owns balloons!) Whether or not the fear of August (Augustamphobia?) has an actual effect on Kane’s past performances (it doesn’t), it’s good to see him conquering his “fears” and getting on the board with a brace, a very important and necessary step as he looks to become only the third player in Premier League history to win three consecutive Golden Boots. The other two are Prem Legends Alan Shearer and Thierry Henry, who were 24 and 26, respectively, when they won the first of their three Botas Doradas. Kane just turned 24 this past July and has two under the belt. To paraphrase another mildy entertaining movie, you’re [once again] a wizard, Harryyyy!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Okay let’s begin with a bit of full disclosure, I’m a Manchester United fan. So my ability to be impartial when discussing a Liverpool acquisition isn’t exactly easy. Then again I’m a sports journalist of the highest integrity. (Pause for heavy laughter). Okay, so take my perspective on Christian Benteke with a grain of salt but here’s the thing I sort of like the big Belgian’s fit. At first like many EPL fans I thought “here we go again Rodgers trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.” Of course that may not be wrong, I said as much in my Sh*t I’ve thought since the end of last term post a few weeks back. But my point then and it’s my point now is Benteke is a better player than Rodgers previous square peg blunders (Andy Carroll and Rickie Lambert). So let’s take a look at Christian Benteke and what the future hold a for his Fantasy Premier League prospects for 2014-15.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I know you were all sitting on the end of your seat waiting, pining for the scores and facilitators to come out.  Well you ask we provide.  That’s what we do here at Razzball we are givers.  We are the Unicef of fantasy knowledge that we give away for free to all the peeps.  So the Forwards and Midfielder rankings were much tougher to rank for Ralph and myself.  The diversity of the midfielder rankings is what makes it by far the most important position in fantasy.  The price between top and bottom and the talent that fills in the gooey core is vital to contstructing a championship caliber team.  From a personal not when constructing a midfielder group I like to put guys into 4 categories and make sure I have at least one guy from each group.  I do these usually by price, with a side of my own mental capacity and some luck.  So here’s the Middies and glory hound forward rankings for the 2015/16 season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Well hello there strangers, guess what starts in 3 weeks.  Yup it’s the New Edition revival tour.  Ohh…. you thought by the title it was going to be something pun-tastic or maybe one of those fun double entendre thing-a-ma-jiggies.   This post is all about the illustrious R&B band form the 80’s and 90’s, it is definitely not about footie.  Ok maybe a little about footie and a little about Johnny Gill, and the fellas.  Lets’s get to it shall we, it’s been a typical all speculation and a hurry up and wait type transfer window this year.  Everyone has money to spend with hopes of being up in the top flight when it kicks in next season.  So robbing Peter to pay Paul later is all the gas right now.  The top 4 teams from last year have back-filled and profiled their rosters with lads form all other top leagues throughout the world.  I am going to touch on a few that could be considered right from the jump, others that I don’t touch on are better real world players than FPL fantasy standards.  So stay around and see what’s new in the world of 2015-16 fantasy FPL.

Please, blog, may I have some more?