Yup, I am unfortunately the bearer of bad news, I mean someone has to be “that Guy”.  I do take some kind of joy out of it, because let’s be honest it takes a special kind of a-hole to be “that guy”.  Ralph knows I am that guy, the bearer of bad anything, the most likely to say something inappropriate, blame a fart on the dog…yeah him.  With the week 12 games comes another break in action, this is like a strategy kick in the you know whats.  Just when you get into a comfortable roster rotation, guys picked out for multiple weeks then BAM.  The risk of injury hits.  Let’s just hope that it isn’t a continuation of the other Fantasy Football wrath of injuries that have happened.  So this week is a stay sound make square moves to the good and don’t risk it on guys who have one good fixture week. Wasting a free transfer is like using a 20% off coupon for a dollar purchase, but having two for the week after the Int’l break seems to me like the best piece of advice that anyone who calls themselves anything of an expert to do. So don’t give into the itch, wait for the injury fairy to rear its ugly head (because it’s going to happen in some way) and then attack week 13 in 3 weeks with the vigor of a man/woman with twice the buying power.  Here’s a list just because I need something to talk about from guys who could be worth monitoring, or if you don’t wanna listen to me.  Cheers!

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Sit with me if you will, and let’s separate time and space.  It was an eerily similar time last year when Harry Kane in all his cheap priced goodness sat on the bench waiting for the time to shine.  It is almost exactly one year to the date give or take a week or so.  We can do that, we are all friends and stuff, fake fantasy friends.  He was an under-utilized, under-valued (or so we found out) and soon to be roster darling.  He ended the year with 21 net bulges and tons of unregistered bulges from all the COYS rooters.  So here we are now, Kane was basically overpriced for his production to date, until this week happened and everyone is sitting with £3-4m in their kitty from the roster expunging of Kun. So the big question is do you and at what cost.  Vardinho needs to stay in your lineup, so avert your eyes elsewhere.  He falls into that secondary striker mode a la Pelle and Lukaku. Kane’s schedule is decent enough for the next 10 matches that you may want to roster now, enjoy the roster salary boost and then re-assess after week 19.  So that is my main advice this week, if you are looking for a “ride or die” option up top for the foreseeable future, then The Hurricane is your man.  For those of you not sold and may need help elsewhere, here’s some decent match-up and form based transfer assessments for ya.  Cheers!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I dig that we still have the Arsenal/Sunderland fixture to be played, but honestly so what.  It’s the last week of school, teachers don’t care if you bring a pencil let alone the appropriate book to class.  So like fantasy football there is only one reason well actually two but the second one is you’re a loser, eat paste and are your mom’s laundry boy (only because the laundry is in the basement).  The first one well that’s not that simple, I really just wanted to quote O.P.P there.  It is totally simple you are still in the hunt for the c’ship or if you play in a league with some money then go get it kid.  This week is not a week to play favorites, to play your cousin if he plays in the league or anyone that you have an allegiance to.  We only get one free transfer this week and if you were ever going to take a minus its now or literally never.  So take a look at my ideas of Fantasy Premier League transfers for the finale week.

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After a one month hiatus the Champions League choo-choo starts chugging along again today, and with it, quarterfinal contests on Mondogoal. Over the next two days arguably six of the world’s ten biggest clubs will hit the pitch. Unfortunately for most of us footie addicts in the States these games will be played toward the tail end of our work days. Meaning we’ll spend most of the afternoon refreshing our browser and keeping an eye out for the boss. With a Madrid Derby and a showdown between Juventus and Monaco on the schedule there’s plenty to keep your interest. Well unless you’re more interested in Home and Garden TV then you might get bored of staring at the pretty green grass after about 20 minutes. That’s fine don’t watch, but be a pal and keep a lookout for the bossman. If you do I’ll split my winnings on Mondo with you. Who knows, it may just be enough to buy a feast at McDonalds or floor mats for your Ford Focus. Not sure if you realize this but Mondogoal pays real money and it’s the only place where you can play daily fantasy soccer in every league of any relevance. Hell I was able to make $50 on the Natick Youth soccer league last week. Speaking of that I’d like to clear the air and say in no way, shape, or form did I provide any of the players I picked with Redbull soaked orange slices. Those are outright lies and I have a sterling reputation to uphold in the community. Now that we’ve cleared the air let’s get down to my UCL quarterfinal picks for the first leg.

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So, as we do every match day, we’re giving you our loves and hates for this week in a segment called Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em.  You should know the drill but if you don’t, we each pick one option from each position, and then, for a bonus, we show you our genius line-ups for the week.  Pretty cut and dry, and quite simply… basic.  The best part is, you get two opinions for the price of one.  We do this as a tandem, it’s the Smokey and Ralph show.  It’s like musical chairs, without all the screaming kids and regretful feeling of loss. So sit back, relax, and have a look at who we would start and sit based on match-ups and value. It’s Start ‘Em, Sit ‘Em Week 28 Fantasy Premier League.

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Well the point of listing anyone not on Spurs or QPR to transfer in this week is probably pointless.  We only get so many free transfers a week and last week some of us had to scramble to form a roster so no extra transfers for free.  So with Spurs and the R’s face double game weeks for the first time this year and well if you aren’t adding Spurs players this week then you need to be hit in the head with a pipe wrench and thrown in the meadows.  It’s simple this week from the transfer standpoint, you need a guy to get you 5 points in 2 games for the minus 4 points to not sting as much.  We are greedy though, we want to get double digit games from all players with 2 games.  While I don’t love the options that QPR has based on their 2 tough match-ups, as the face Arsenal and Spurs at home.  Which is sometimes good because at Loftus they are a different team. So my best advice is to use it as a swerve move to capture points from the leaders or if you already own the maximum 3 Tottenham players.  So have at my list of Fantasy Premier League transfers ideas, it’s littered with fun stuff and stickers for the kids.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ahhhh, week veintiseis you are a tough one to judge mis amigo.  Lots of tough fixtures this week that pit good teams facing stout opponents at home.  It’s also a fast turn around for the table leaders of Chelsea as the Champions league starts up again today.  So keep that in mind for some last minute changes to your roster because there will be a lot of roster jostling, which if I am reading this right is the first cousin of shaken baby syndrome.   Be heady, yet patient and my best advice for this week is wait as long as possible on your transfer(s) to try and feel some of the managers and gauge fitness of some chaps before Saturday kickoffs.  As always good luck and cheers, it’s Transfer Tuesday!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So, as we do every match day, we’re giving you our loves and hates for this week in a segment called Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em.  You should know the drill but if you don’t, we each pick one option from each position, and then, for a bonus, we show you our genius line-ups for the week.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So every week I review all the games… yeah I do it running on high test caffeinated drinks, squeezing as much of the game info I can, and then form a sort of “dream team” of my very own.  I do it differently, and I use the best players, but at a shrunken budget, because we all can’t be high rollers.  So with Week 16 now officially closed, lets take a look at my formidable Starting XI.  Keep in mind that I limit myself to £70.0m budget, and barring earthquake or an extreme case of the mumps, I will conform to the standard 4-4-2 form.  Enjoy, comments, quips or an occasional curse word are always welcomed here at Razzbol FC. (Points scored for the week are in parenthesis.)

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So instead of the whole rigmarole of writing about every single game and having us look at the same fantasy relevant players every week, we are doing something new. It’s so new, I couldn’t even think of a great name, so if you have something better please say so.  We all can watch the games and see who does what, but at the end of the day, from a fantasy perspective, all that matters is the point total  next to their name.  Well, in soccer, like every other sport, there are unspoken subtleties that make up a good roster.  So I am featuring the best starting XI.  It will be my opinion, and to make it fun and hard, I will be using a £70m cap and using a standard 4-4-2 .  So from my standpoint, it’s fun and adventurous to make up a new roster from the week-to-week shining stars.  So have a look at my own featured XI…

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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